While I was doing that I noticed out of the corner of my eye, something that kept flying around the bathroom (Isn't that always the way it is, you always see these critters at the edge of your vision?).
Finishing up with a swig of water to wash the pills down, as I was undressing, I saw the culprit resting on the wall near the toilet paper holder. A doctor fly. I knew it! I'll bet he was just watching me to see what I was going to do so he could plan his attack.
|A Doctor Fly. Also Called A Yellow Fly Thanks to the U of Fla. for the foto|
Putting my glasses back on, so that I'd be sure of getting a good shot at him, I lined up and swung. Using my right hand too, to ensure deadly aim, I missed him - not by much, but enough that he took off toward the ceiling.
With lightning reflexes, I swung with a strong backhand and made contact with him. Unfortunately, I lost track of where I had knocked him. It's a good idea to keep track of the critters after a successful hit, because usually, you have to whack them again to kill them, otherwise, they're likely to just feign death, wait a bit, shiver and shake, and take off to try coming after you again.
Like I said, I lost him, so I undressed, getting ready for my shower. As I was stepping into the shower enclosure, I saw something on the floor of the shower over against the far wall. I looked closer, and sure enough it was the doctor fly I had whacked before, just lying there motionless.
I grabbed the fly swatter once again and clobbered him again, this time knocking him into the middle of the shower. I nudged him onto the fly swatter with my finger and dumped him into the toilet.
As often happens with doctor flies, I was just kind of gazing at him, making sure he was dead, when I noticed a twitch, and another. "Son of a bitch, he's not dead," I thought. I pulled a couple of sheets off the toilet paper roll and covered him with them. I was going to leave him, but thought better of it at that time and so hit the flush lever, sending him to the great septic tank in the sky.
Or so I thought. Here he comes back up swirling around with the water filling the toilet bowl. "Damn. Tough little thing, isn't he?" I said to myself, and grabbed a couple more sheets of toilet paper and covered him with those.
Thinking he was surely done for, I stepped into the shower and proceeded to wash the afternoon and evening's sweat off. As I stepped out of the shower, I glanced into the toilet bowl once again. Uh oh. toilet paper was there floating on the surface, but no doctor fly.
That little begger had out-foxed me completely. Talk about being tough. He survived three good whacks with the fly swatter, one flushing, and two attempted drownings using the toilet paper, and he still managed to make a clean getaway.
I looked for him for a bit, but never saw sign of him again. I even looked this morning. Nothing. Probably just as well. As tough as he hadappeared to be, I'm not sure but that he might have whacked me soundly and then tried to stuff me in the toilet.
Sometimes, it's probably better to wait for another day and try again. Or maybe I need to move one of the blue balls into the bathroom. Doctor flies don't seem to be able to resist those too well.
As an example, here's a shot of the blue beach ball we have hanging in the front breezeway.
|Not Well Focused, but Gets the Idea Across|
So, the next time you hit a doctor fly, and are tempted to leave him for the ants to remove... Are you sure he's dead - really sure?