05 December, 2012

Only 16 More Days!

Holy s***! I just realized the end of the world is speedily sneaking up on us and we're at ground zero for the big extravaganza! We haven't even gotten our 'for rent' signs out for the pool house. Nor did we do anything else to try and capture some of the 'end of the world' pot-o-gold crapola.
Mayan Calendar
(Regarding the title of this post, to be perfectly accurate, it should be 15 and a wake-up. But that might be putting too fine an edge on it.)

So, it takes place on December 21. I heard on the tube the other day (I was only half awake at the time) that it actually occurs at eleven minutes after eleven... Anyone know if that's AM or PM? Just my luck, I'd pick the wrong one.

You know, it's weird. Here in the heart of the historical Mayan civilization, or at least on the urban edges of it, it seems, at least in our area, that nobody is primed to make a buck off this thing. From what I've seen on the tube, it's folks from all over the world that're all primed for making a pile of bucks.

Geez, we could'a made a fortune just renting the place out. Some meditation exercises on the pool deck, an hour or so in the pool, some gazing at our navels, and before you know it, we'd have enough money that we too could retire to paradise...

Oh. That's right... We're already here. Well, maybe that's why we've been slow to get started. Geez, somebody better send money in a hurry. We've got a lot of catching up to do.

Let's see, what can we do to attract the end of the world tourist dollar? Hmm, We could offer quick and dirty tours of the Santa Rita Mayan ruins. We could drive you up there in our Isuzu and let you run around the place. It's not much really, but it's authentic.

I've heard that the 'powers that be' are thinking of excavating it to have more of the place on display. Really all they need to do is get rid of some of the graffiti and they'll have a winner. Just think. You'd be walking around and looking at it in almost pristine condition.

Afterwards we could take you to the Belikin Distributors - they're just in front of the ruins. A couple of cold ones will get you right into the spirit of things. I'm sure it's been there almost as long as the ruins. They had to drink something while they were building it, right? So, I'm sure the Maya just called up the Temple Beer boys and ordered up a few well-chilled cases.

Just think. You'd be on hand for the end of the world, or at least in the center of all the activity - whatever that might be when the long count calendar runs out.  I dunno. Better stock up on an extra case or two, just to be sure.


JRinSC said...

Boy, how well I know it. We will be over the Pacific in a 747 going to Austrailia when 12/21/12 ends...

If we weren't doing that I'd see about renting the guest house so we could partake of all those neat ideas you have... lol


Dave Rider said...

Hi Julian,

Going to dine at the real outback, eh? Sounds like fun. Have a safe trip.


Anonymous said...

Perhaps you need Michael Stipe and REM (hometown boys from Athens, GA) to come and sing "It's the end of the world as we know it. And I feel fine!"

Dave Rider said...

Hi Any Mouse,

When the shtf, it's as good as any and probably better than most for an end time.
Lotta good musicians have come out of Georgia.